Lately I’ve been sorta lazy, I guess. Well, I’ve been working a bit, but I mean as far as my productivity outside of work, I’m sorta in a rut.
I’ve not worked on my documentary in over a week, I haven’t been practicing guitar, I’ve been snoozing my alarm daily, etc. I also have been really distant from nearly all of my friends, and that goes as far as even texting. I just forget to do some of these things. The past week I’ve usually ignored my alarm for an average of 2 hours daily. Go to bed at 3, set alarm for 11, hit snooze until it’s 1:30 and I finally roll out of bed.
From that description it sounds like I’m depressed, but in reality I’ve just not been giving it my all recently. I’ve made some excuses, finding reasons as to why it shouldn’t be necessary for me to give 100 percent all the time. But, the fact of the matter is, if I don’t try as hard as I can, I’m not gonna be who I’m trying to be. And that’s a person who ignores sleep issues and gives enough effort to get up on time, do what I want to do, do what I need to do.
As far as time goes, I’ve got plenty of it, outside of just shifts at work. Class isn’t time consuming, I only take one, yadda yadda. But, of course, I’m sleeping most of my day away as it is. Well, for one, I have to start going to bed earlier.
I’m slowly scaling my sleep schedule back. Every night going to bed a little earlier, yet for the past week, waking up around the same time. It will change over time, going to bed at 3 is still much too late. It is an improvement over 4, however, but hopefully by tonight it will be 2. And thus, I’ll get up earlier, and have more time before work or more time in general to be productive.
It’s important to remember this simple saying, and that is that there should be no excuses. Excuses don’t really serve any purpose other than to mitigate emotional distress. You want to feel better about not doing something, or maybe doing something, yet don’t really wanna accept the full reality of the situation so you use an excuse. Well, in some situations there are legitimate reasons for why something went down the way it did- but that’s the thing, those aren’t deemed excuses. Those are reasons. Excuses are things that you know you could change, yet it may be challenging, so you ‘skip ahead’. It’s a terrible habit to have, a habit of making excuses. It will tear you down.
Some days I reflect on things I’ve done before in order to give myself a peace of mind when I’m not doing something. This is okay, occasionally. But, here is the time when it’s not okay.
Think of it this way. You want to relax and be lazy for a day. Okay, that’s completely okay. Go do it. But, what if you wanna do it the next day, as well? Well, you could just remember that one time you did that one amazing thing and think “wow, it’s okay to take another day off”. Maybe it is, maybe you can. However, if you started doing that more and more often, it’d become habitual, and sooner or later you’d forget that the reason you have made success is because you made effort, not excuses.
In order to keep moving forward, you have to not let up. It can’t happen everyday, I understand that. But, if you want to constantly be moving forward, changing day to day, and exceeding the expectations of yourself and others, then an annoying amount of effort must be made. Excuses aren’t a part of this equation. I think I’ve forgotten that lately, and unfortunately, it’s why I’ve been kinda of complacent lately. If you’re on a track going somewhere and you want to keep going there, you have to keep driving.
Thanks for reading
Luca DeJesu, 3:35 PM